House parties. Women love them. Most men don’t even know what they are.

Women have house parties for everything. Tupperware. Avon. Candles. Jewelry. Cookware. Food. Home furnishings. Lingerie. Sex toys. You name it, and there’s a house party for it. For women, it’s perfect; socializing and shopping wrapped into one. Free stuff for the hostess. Prizes for the guests. Snacks and drinks. Gab and gossip. And no men within 100 yards to complain.

Think about it; no one around to tell them to be quiet and stop spending money.

Men, on the other hand, could care less about having a house party. Our idea of anything even remotely close to a house party involves either the Super Bowl, NASCAR, or strippers. Alcohol is a requirement, and cigars are optional. We don’t care about buying stuff that smells good, compliments our wardrobe or doubles as a turkey baster/vibrator. We don’t gossip, but instead talk about the neighbor with the huge rack and her thong lines. The only thing we need money for is the beer. And the stripper.

Just try to imagine a male house party. What are we gonna have a party for….tools? Fishing equipment? Auto parts? Do we give out free screwdrivers or earthworms for prizes? There is no product within the male realm which is worthy of a gathering like this. Give us a swap meet or a garage sale and we can stock up on anything we need, plus we get the bonus of saving postage on sending out invitations and having to wash snack bowls afterwards.

I’ve never had an interest in attending any of these, unless it was a lingerie party. Naturally, I was laughed at and told “No”. So even when trying to show interest to make a significant other happy, it’s not meant to be.

So, let women have their parties, and us men will just keep on avoiding them. It’s the way things should be. Until the next Super Bowl, anyway.

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1. by DrowseyMonkey on June 27th, 2008 at 2:13 pm

   LOL … oh, it’s funny ’cause it’s true. I love that photo too, HA!

2. by Anita (Prairie Dreams) on June 28th, 2008 at 7:06 pm

   Actually, I’m a woman, and I’ve always hated house parties. They play the most ridiculous games - you can’t even imagine.
   Of course, i hate shopping all together… I’d rather be at your Super Bowl party. lol

3. by Urso Branco on June 30th, 2008 at 8:25 am

   LOL. I am a man and I love this post. How true it is!

   I have even become immune to house parties. That comes with old age. I just go for a walk at the first sign of a House Party.

   Urso Branco

4. by Peter Answers on July 1st, 2008 at 7:07 pm

   LOL - that is so true! My wife and I just had a party for 30 people and I would have been fine with BYOB and a dish to pass but no, just has to get caterers involved, rent a margarita machine, etc. (Not that those margaritas weren’t tasty!)

5. by Angela on July 25th, 2008 at 7:11 pm

   LOL You are so funny! I dont like house parties either! Unless its a baby shower. (does that count?)

6. by Wendy on August 7th, 2008 at 5:34 pm

   What these house parties REALLY are?

   “Manipulate your social circle and guilt your friends, coworkers and acquaintances into giving money to a pyramid scheme.”

   I’m a woman and think these are a total ripoff! Particularly for the person trying to sell this junk.

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